Missing is my writing mojo. Last seen in July 2016. Dearly missed. If found please contact me in comments below.
I dreamt last night of a couple crossing the street. Me in my vehicle, waiting for them to progress but it was not to be as the woman fell down with the man helping her. I got out and proceeded to pick them up. The man wanted no help from me. He was disoriented. He was wearing military uniform with all the usual array of medals and such with the number 324 prominently showing. “Let me help you, you need help.” I said to him. No was his reply. “My father died of a stroke and I think that is what is happening to you.” I say to him. “Exactly!” is what he said as he stood up proudly. I was shaken momentarily and walked away. It was a very vivid dream with me carrying a red wallet and the song, “Wayward Son” with these lyrics playing all the while…”Carry on my wayward son, For there’ll be peace when you are done. Lay your weary head to rest Now don’t you cry no more.”
Waking up this morning I check the numbers and sure enough 324 has meaning. “You stand shoulder to shoulder with benevolent guardian angels, archangels, and ascended masters. Surrounded by such powerful Divine love, you can feel certain of a positive outcome to this situation.” Red as I checked out with this as follows does resonate with me. “The alchemists had a much more narrow interpretation of the color red. For them, red was fire. But in alchemy, fire was more than simply heat. Fire was the force of creativity, the force what allowed radical transformation in the fulminato stage — the stage that directly preceded the accomplishment of the “Great Work. In dreams, red may be similarly interpreted meaning that the dreamer is engaged not only in a time of deep creative passion, but creativity that radically transforms one from the soul up and down and in and out.”
So this past summer it has been the ending of a relationship but with that a greater understanding of who I truly am and what I made out of. We seem to think that this is how it should be when life all of a sudden throws a curve ball and says no such luck girlie! That happened but now I stand resolute and sure of myself. At this time meditation helps soothe the soul as does knowing that there are people to support me as well as on the other side with healing. Not a day goes by that I do know that my father is around me and shows me with his symbol, the number 3. The peacefulness of the days carries this one down her path. I know there are greater things that await and I look forward to this adventure we call life. This was my gift from the universe and such a great learning experience to take away from it all.
I am in a snow covered dream. I love snow by the way. Sauntering down a sidewalk I spy my dad clearing snow off a red car. My first thought is that he is alive. He looks so vibrant and happy. Noticing that now he is looking up to a third floor apartment as now he is shoveling snow into the convertible. My dad had a good sense of humor as I am told and this to notice him more in this dream. Gazing up I see no one there only the lace curtains move slightly. Dad is still shoveling. Looking up again I see Dad’s partner Bernice walk away from the window. This is when I suddenly realize that my Father is dead and in a little girl voice I say, “I miss you Daddy!” I awake suddenly and still hear my young voice. This dream makes me happy and I know I will have a good day. My visitations from good old Dad are rare but I remember each and everyone of them. Knowing that he guides me during my waking hours comforts me. The red is always prominent in my dreams with him. It was pointed out by my friend that in my new home there is a lot of red popping out from paintings, textiles and such. I hadn’t realized until then.
This early morning I was to awake from a entirely different dream. A man walks with me on a cruise ship. He is dressed in army attire. This catches my attention as my dad was in the army as you all know. There is a trusting moment but only too briefly as he shows his true colors. I want to run away from him now and am saved by a woman who intervenes by talking to him. I then make my get away.
In this scenario I know that I should be protecting myself a lot more than I choose to. Grounding and bathing ones self in white light as I do in good intention certainly goes a long way. Always I express gratitude before I close my eyes and ask from protection from Archangel Michael at sleep time. I do. When we, as lightworker’s open ourselves to spirit the occasional rift raff do drop in but only momentarily. But I rather opt for nothing at all if that can be helped. I do not care for these visits from them. On the other hand my dreams from loved ones that have passed I would welcome every night if that was so possible!
It’s been crazy peaceful from where I sit. A new way of looking through my eyes, through my consciousness. Trying to go back in time to do the same old things I was going before and it ain’t working..at all! Good for me to think of others activities to occupy my mind. Reading many books that are opening my mind more and more. Picked up “Untethered Soul” the journey beyond yourself by Michael A.Singer a few weeks ago and I have to say that for once really paying attention to this jewel of a book. Working with inner self.
The move from the old house into the new went off without a hitch and everything has gone swimmingly. I have started to do more readings and found my calling in mediumship but will delve into the intuition side or vibe coaching as I call it. I am a medium! I How I love saying that. It sounded strange the first time I told a person what it is I do for a living. Talking to your past loved ones. The intuitive side is your day to day vibrations about you.
So there you have it all in a nice little bundle. After all the past couple of years to fully develop my brain to see what I have been doing all this time but to totally understand it. It’s like someone flipped the switch on and said, “VOILA!”
The readings are joyful but sad at the same time. The person that has passed shows me visions or symbols. Feeling, seeing, hearing, tasting it all in the time I channel this vibrant being that once was, is all learning and fascinating for me. To be invited to see all this is a honor and this I tell to the client. I have had humorous, loud, timid people thus far come through. They show me puzzles, tupperware; (she loved takeout), fishing, and sometimes they way they passed. I acknowledge all this and move on in the reading.
So my mantra, “I want to help heal, I want to heal with healing messages” have come to fruition. We are made of energy and manifest what we think. My mind had focused on this for many, many years and so happy I am where I am. There is much more that has been happening but drinking it in for now.
As strange as this might sound to you dear reader the following came to me a few moments ago. A must share for definitely I am guided by unseen forces. Spiritual ones that is. “You will flourish.” It came in silently in my mind. I never question these insights for they come out of the blue.
If you have been following my journey of this year you will know that I have moved to a much improved situation. I wake to birds in the many trees surrounding my condo with there song. Add to this is a quietness which is a tonic. My mind has settled and thus my body follows. Peace & tranquility. I am the Queen of Serene! So I thank my guides for giving me this beautiful message and wonder what tomorrow will bring.
I think back on my life and on the many experiences that the universe has allowed me to have. Some good, some bad, some terrifying. This was to come up in a phone conversation from one of my close friends yesterday and how PTSD had taken the memories from all and maybe not all but certainly the worse of the worse ones. As we were talking it arose the image of me held captive for two or three days before I was to escape this dark room in a small house. I had been taken and handcuffed to a pipe, left to wonder about what was to happen. A man came into the room and crying to him, I begged him to let me go, that I wouldn’t tell. He turned away but not before he unlocked the cuffs from my wrist. I was to wait until he left and then sneak out the back door which he was going to open for me. Dashing out in the brilliant sunny day I felt alive. That is all the memory of that day has let me replay and for that I am grateful. That happened so long ago.
Life make us who we are. It’s as simple as that. We can either carry that burden on our backs and name it victim but I would rather not call it anything at all or carry it for that matter. Deal with it in the present moment and move on. Make the mistake as I did and ignore the situation and it rears its ugly head in some other form or other.
Knowing that is to live in the now and to savor it, understand it for what it is. All to often we as people use food, alcohol, gambling, etc, as diversions to take that pain we have stuffed down on selves. Our souls crave to escape this mad cycle. Was it the day that life said no more for this one? Having that meltdown in my work many years ago certainly did the big turn around for me and brought me to this path of awakening. To understand my purpose. And the ride my friends has been spectacular from this huge merry go around of soul searching.
They say that the teacher come to those that wait and it is true for me. I have had many opportunities and those that I gladly accept. Many workshops, readings to understand where I am, classes and healing sessions. Am I the same person of 16, 23, 38 or 49? No, not even close. True I have my wicked sense of humor and still love to tell stories designed to make you think but my decision making skills have definitely vibed up. This lady has got her chance her kick at the cat so to speak. I can hardly wait to see what happens today.
Outlook is everything is it not dear reader? Have you ever felt that shift when your experiences seem to jive as if you are on course. You have found your purpose, never mind trying to find it in the first place as I did.
High school was a breeze for me. Being an honor student, a far cry from the girl who had to repeat Grade 7. But there was one thing that I didn’t have what everyone else had. A plan. Had no clue what I wanted to be. It never entered my mind as a young child to say, “I want to be a nurse or a doctor.” I might have well just said, “I want to be a truck” for all the effort I was giving my education. Taking subjects meant for the type of work well suited. I didn’t get that. Coasting was my best subject.
Back then I just wanted to get by, which I did but desired so much more. Purpose 101 was very big back then for me in daily life and what was the big picture for me career wise? What was I suppose to be doing? Being on my own partying was to factor in and so was travelling aimlessly through our provinces. Had to have an edge to keep myself safe. And yes I was a catholic girl but such a bad ass too.
I am but a far cry from the person that I am now. Much more grounded, having more faith and less doubt of what is, happy and so at peace. It feels like new skin, new experiences like I went back to school to re-learn everything about life. The purpose of healing be it from energy healing to healing messages through psychic or mediumship readings or simply coaching people. I get the feeling of it, what I do now. It comes easy whereas I was thinking way to hard about what intuition was all about or suppose to be about. I had my own ideas about it for sure. The third eye was kind of hard to understand. I actually thought an eye was going to pop out anytime. That made my aunt laugh about that one. Makes me laugh now, at my naivety.
Life for me now is interspersed with meditation, coaching sessions from mentors, prayers and daily living. This skin feels vibrant, excited for new adventures, the unknown. Let it be known that we are students in this vast universe and when not students, teachers as well. Dear reader, you can never go back and repeat after me, “I am not what I once was.”
One room is empty as I start the process of packing and leaving this old gal, this old home built in 1955. The number of boxes, too many to count line the dining room wall. I have given away a lot of stuff to the second hand stores and know that there will more trips there. I feel lighter.
It was bought in 1986 to house my child and my boyfriend at the time, Colin. He was the push to find somewhere to live and settle down. The premise was to eventually marry but this was not to be. There were many problems and his drug addiction was one of them. The emotional abuse was to follow and I was his to do with whatever when he came home after days away. I was to stand up to him one day when I had had it and told him to give it to me with all that he had. He laughed and walked away. In that defining moment I was to find my strength. Thank you Colin for showing me that I could do this on my own.
And yes I made the payment of the mortgage on my own. To find a job as a bank teller and to learn more about investment side of life. Also to rent out the basement suite to bring in more monies.
The tenants that have lived in the basement suite and to move on and purchase there own homes were many. There were some memorable characters such as the woman who brought a dog in the suite. I have always stated a no smoking, no pets rule you see.There were many stable people that lived with me, hard working people and people that needed a helping hand. My last three tenants were finally the initiative to find a better way of life. The first, last summer was to party at all hours of the night. The second was to bring a cat in and smoke incessantly. The third loved his loud music and told me that he was deaf and this is why it was loud.
They all three did this gal a favor. It was time to let go. To let go of the upkeep of this old gal. I see the beauty of her. The rounded corners on the doorways. The big windows. The beautiful doors. the huge yard and garage. My most awesome neighbors. But I am so ready to find out what is out there in another community, in another albeit smaller home. But I started with this in mind. The adventure. This is what it is all about for me. Another month of being in the now to savor my time alone and to always remember what this stability got me.
My life has gained greater momentum now with decisions made in the beginning of this new year. Asking the great universe for signs as if this would be the right time to sell my house and it was to be. A new condo to move in was procured. The little dream home that I so look forward to being in.
I awake this morning to the sound of my phone ringing. It is my aunt. Answering it, I was soon to be in stitches and thinking how wonderful it was to wake up so happy. Imparting my dream of my father who stood next to a bulldog.
To see a bulldog in your dream signifies that some protective force is helping you move forward in life.”
With this she told me that he is around to make sure I am taken care of. I know he is around me. The sound of a loose floor board that moves on its own and thus makes the dresser move and then also moves the purse on the door to shift as well. This is him.
I now have daily conversations with his smiley face emitting from the picture frame on my dresser. This is my comfort. It seems as though days go by with nary an adventure to be had and then you wake to something so beautiful it makes your heart sing! #GratitudeForThisLife